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The internet is full of spurious advice from "pick-up artists" and "seduction gurus" promising to cure you of your blue balls in exchange for a follow or a quick cash payment. Truth is, most of these self-professed "experts" are men. Lydia Morrish and Kate Lismore are both young journalists who live in London and who write about "all things female" in a series of columns and advice articles.

Willow
Age: 39
Eyes: I’ve got big blue eyes but I use colored contact lenses
Favourite drink: Gin
Favourite music: Opera
What is my hobbies: Collecting

Views: 4805

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Sounding articulate, knowledgeable, and generally smart can make you seem very attractive in a first conversation. Any recommendations? Just be careful to steer clear of jokes that are overtly political, vulgar, or crass. Attention to detail is critical in every part of life — including the dating scene. Talking to women isn't rocket science though. A great compliment makes you seem kind, attentive, considerate and can lead to a great conversation.

Oftentimes, even after you shoot your shot, the woman in question leaves you hanging, never bothering to message you back. The same applies for clothing with references to movies or TV. Recent blockbuster releases, popular music, and reality television shenanigans are all safe bets.

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A study by Marisa Cohen of St. Even if your last relationship ended on a sour note, try to focus on the potential for a new, healthier, happier relationship than giving into the temptation to dig up old beef. In order to increase your chances of actually starting a conversation over an online dating platform, take the time to look at her photos and bio to see if you share a similar hobby, taste in music or favorite hang-out place.

One of the simplest ways to do this is to use the setting of the conversation to your advantage.

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The ability to make a woman laugh is extremely potent — definitely among the best skills on this list. If the host introduces you, you show that you've got social pull.

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Almost everyone loves movies or has a favorite Netflix series. This might seem like a redundant statement, but landing a joke at the beginning of a conversation lets your interlocutor know that you have a great sense of humor. Start off by sharing something you like to do, and then ask her to pipe in.

This is a guest post by Claudia Cox, founder of Text Weapon.

1. give a compliment

However, there is a caveat — talking too much or acting too knowledgeable can actually be a turnoff. When it comes to talking to women, start by disclosing your personal favorite and then ask her about hers. For example, if you hated the most recent season of Game of Thrones, you might not want to bring it up until you know your conversational partner a little better; starting off a conversation on a negative note casts a negative shadow over the rest of your interaction. You might be afraid of rejection or coming off the wrong way. Sure, striking up a conversation with a beautiful woman can be intimidating, but on the flip side missing an incredible opportunity to make a connection just because you were too shy to approach her is wayyyy worse!

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Coincidentally, when women aged 21 to 54 were asked what characteristics they found most attractive in men, a good sense of humor was ranked highest out of all possible personality traits. These personality-based compliments give you both a lot more room to continue the conversation, especially compared to appearance-based compliments. Instead of focusing on what she does for a living, ask her what she likes to do in her free time.

Genuine compliments go a long way toward inspiring trust. Want to learn more? Career and personal coach Marty Nemko, Ph. What do you think? Talk to her to find out more! Have you tried any of their appetizers? Fact: If you let anyone talk about themselves, they will like you more for it. Interacting with the ladies can seem tough.

What do you like to do in your free time?

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A really easy strategy for striking up a conversation is to use what you have in common as a springboard. Find out and build a conversation off of it. If you establish yourself as a funny guy at the onset of a conversation, you have a much higher chance of seeming attractive to your conversational partner! Just remember to keep it lighthearted — avoid politics, and try not to bring up a pop culture event that you feel negatively about. Did you ever actually get sick of all the sunshine?

How to actually chat up a woman, according to two women

You'd be surprised as to what you'll have in common with any woman. This way, you give your conversational partner the opportunity to share her expertise and offer her opinions, instead of steamrolling her with your knowledge.

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One of the easiest ways to strike up a conversation with a woman is to open with a compliment! It confirms that you're not a weirdo at the very least.

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When surveyed about the personality traits that they find most attractive in men, women responded that intelligence was the second-most important trait, beaten only by a good sense of humor. In fact, according to Forbes Magazine, effective communication just might be the single most important skill you could possibly learn!

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Bringing up seemingly mundane, yet common ground topics such as the band or special drink menu is an easy way to get a natural conversation started.